Torrey: Relax. Refresh. Recenter.

Our weekend trip to Torrey was absolutely lovely. I did nothing for three whole days--no work, no cleaning (okay, I did clean the Torrey house before we left), no cooking, no teaching, nothing. I read a book for the first time in weeks. I watched TV. I played games with Tim (It's fun, it's challenging, it's exciting, it's Sequence!). I took a bubble bath. I took a nap. I slept in. (Are you jealous yet?) It was so relaxing, and just the right amount of time to do nothing. Any longer and I would have started to get a little antsy, but three days (okay, two and a half) was perfect.

Sadly, I didn't take many pictures, though really, there wasn't much to take pictures of. Maybe I should have had Tim take a picture of me napping or something... In any event, here are the few I got:

Driving to Torrey



Playing Sequence



The backyard view


I think the best part of the weekend was that I felt a little bit more like myself. I haven't had time to do much more than what I have to get done in the last several weeks and months, and having the time to remind myself that I love to read made me feel a little more centered. Last week, I attempted to go hear Terry Tempest Williams speak (and failed--there was no parking at BYU that didn't require a twenty minute walk), and I read a few of her essays in preparation. Suddenly, I was the MFA grad student again--thinking, analyzing, itching to write. I hadn't realized how much I miss that part of myself until I was so disappointed I wasn't able to hear her speak that I very nearly cried.

Many days I am too tired after working to do more than the essentials--laundry, lesson plans, cleaning the house, working from home, preparing a Sharing Time lesson--and I am really enjoying my sewing projects and developing a new talent. But sometimes I look at the things that I feel make me truly me and I worry that I am losing myself to the demands of my life. (And I don't even have children yet...I can't imagine trying to add that huge demand in and staying sane!) I'm still me, just...stretched a little thin. And missing the activities that bring fulfillment, particularly intellectual and aesthetic fulfillment. It goes back to all those hats I wear. I have some hats I haven't worn in a long time, and sometimes I worry I've lost them. Torrey let me try one of them on again, for which I am very grateful. Like I said, a very good weekend.