Welcome to 2018

Welcome back, little blog and any blog readers still out there. It's a new year and the perfect time for a fresh start, even if all previous attempts to do so haven't gotten off the ground. I've been kicking around the idea writing more this year and my forgotten blog seemed a good, structured way to start doing that. So here we are!

Last year was a mixed bag of good and bad, fun and struggle, good choices and tired ones, and while I initially felt like I/we ended the year pretty much where we started, I can see now that we made some progress. Both Tim and I became much more aware of some of the mental health challenges that have kept us in negative holding patterns, and just recognizing and naming those challenges has helped, albeit in small ways. As a result, I've learned to notice my patterns of thought and behavior and what affects them. I could write a whole lot more about this (and I probably will!), but for now, I'll just say that my intentions for 2018 are all about keeping me mentally healthy and positive. I wanted to be sure to write down my intentions for the first part of the year before they all fly out of my mind (a real danger at this point...I'm just so tired!). 

My personal focus for this first stretch of the year is self-care. Not the take a break, relax, do something nice for yourself kind of self-care - believe me, I do plenty of that - but the harder, more rewarding kind that is not about enjoying the moment, but enjoying the one that comes after it and because of it. 

This kind of self-care says, I will exercise not to lose weight, but because it gives me energy and makes me feel better about myself. 

I will get more sleep because it increases my patience and lets me enjoy my kids more.

I will read not to escape, but to expand and stretch my mind.

I will spend time every day in the scriptures, not because I am supposed to, but because it improves my mood and keeps me grounded.

I will make time to write on a weekly basis so my thoughts and feelings don't become toxic. 

And I will give myself the grace to forget, mess up, become distracted, lose focus, and try again. And again. And again. Life is forever tries, or so I've been told. 

Of course, there are more things I want to change and improve in my life (Floss more! Take vitamins!  Play with my kids! Scan old photos! Turn in work assignments on time! Create the perfect chore chart! Keep in touch with friends!) but that list gets overwhelming quickly. So I focus on what I know will make the other things easier to accomplish and try to be content with that. All I can do is try.

As a reward for making it this far, and the celebrate the return of my blog, here are some super cute pictures of my kids, because Why Not?

A focus (not resolution) for the new year

Looking back at the resolutions I set for myself at the beginning of this year, I can't give myself much of a good grade. I think the only thing I did consistently was post on this blog every month. I posted occasionally on my creative writing blog and I did end the school year with some patience left (sort of), but not much else got checked off, or at least not consistently. So instead of making specific resolutions for this next year, I've been thinking about having a focus, instead. Over Christmas I reflected a lot of what's really important and I really feel like relationships and people are what count more than our fitness level or exercise regime. So that's my unspecific focus for the year - people. People that matter to me, people who are far away, people who I might not talk to very often. I want to reconnect and connect a little deeper. Spend quality time, even if it's just a phone call with a friend I haven't seen in months. I realize this will take me a little out of my comfort zone - I'm a homebody who is almost always content to stay in and put things like phone calls or hanging out off. This year, I'm going to try to be better at staying in touch and being involved. There are no specific deadlines or numbers involved, just what I hope will be little steps toward becoming a better, more compassionate person. Wish me luck!

2011 in Anticipation

It's a week into the new year and my "resolutions" have not completely fallen apart. Success! I'm taking things week by week, and I've got a written list on the wall in my bedroom to help me remember what it is I've committed myself to doing this year. In a similar vein, I'm writing some of them here so I have some kind of accountability to myself, if nothing else.

Resolutions (or "Lifestyle Changes", as I prefer to call them):
1. Stick to a schedule for going to bed. We had one once, but it got discarded a while ago. No more! Early bedtime from now on!

2. Exercise. I know, every person on the planet makes some kind of exercise resolution in January, but mine is easy. Three times a week, some kind of exercise for 30 minutes. No big deal. I can totally do that.

3. No sugar. Okay, not entirely. I am allowing myself one dessert a week, but no candy/ice cream/sugary treats in the middle.

4. Read one book a month. I decided only one because I haven't actually read anything for several months, and I didn't want to overwhelm myself with a book a week because that's the quickest way to break a resolution.

5. Post on this blog at least 6 times a month and post on my creative writing blog once a week. I need to jump start my creative writing skills, because they are fading and that is tragic. And pathetic.

6. Get published! And the only way to do that is to start getting rejected, so I'm resetting my goal of getting 100 rejections this year. (I only got two last year...but I got one acceptance too, so maybe that's okay?)

7. End the school year with some patience left. That's really the only realistic goal I have for that.

In summary, I just want to stop doing the things that make me unhealthy (not sleeping, not exercising, eating sugar) and do more of the things that make me a spiritually/intellectually/creatively happier person. It seems like a good plan. And I've discovered that having goals, however small, really motivates me to do more each day. Let's hope I can keep it up!

P.S. I also made a goal to stay in touch with people more, so if you get a phone call from me, don't be alarmed, I just want to chat. :)