Welcome to 2018

Welcome back, little blog and any blog readers still out there. It's a new year and the perfect time for a fresh start, even if all previous attempts to do so haven't gotten off the ground. I've been kicking around the idea writing more this year and my forgotten blog seemed a good, structured way to start doing that. So here we are!

Last year was a mixed bag of good and bad, fun and struggle, good choices and tired ones, and while I initially felt like I/we ended the year pretty much where we started, I can see now that we made some progress. Both Tim and I became much more aware of some of the mental health challenges that have kept us in negative holding patterns, and just recognizing and naming those challenges has helped, albeit in small ways. As a result, I've learned to notice my patterns of thought and behavior and what affects them. I could write a whole lot more about this (and I probably will!), but for now, I'll just say that my intentions for 2018 are all about keeping me mentally healthy and positive. I wanted to be sure to write down my intentions for the first part of the year before they all fly out of my mind (a real danger at this point...I'm just so tired!). 

My personal focus for this first stretch of the year is self-care. Not the take a break, relax, do something nice for yourself kind of self-care - believe me, I do plenty of that - but the harder, more rewarding kind that is not about enjoying the moment, but enjoying the one that comes after it and because of it. 

This kind of self-care says, I will exercise not to lose weight, but because it gives me energy and makes me feel better about myself. 

I will get more sleep because it increases my patience and lets me enjoy my kids more.

I will read not to escape, but to expand and stretch my mind.

I will spend time every day in the scriptures, not because I am supposed to, but because it improves my mood and keeps me grounded.

I will make time to write on a weekly basis so my thoughts and feelings don't become toxic. 

And I will give myself the grace to forget, mess up, become distracted, lose focus, and try again. And again. And again. Life is forever tries, or so I've been told. 

Of course, there are more things I want to change and improve in my life (Floss more! Take vitamins!  Play with my kids! Scan old photos! Turn in work assignments on time! Create the perfect chore chart! Keep in touch with friends!) but that list gets overwhelming quickly. So I focus on what I know will make the other things easier to accomplish and try to be content with that. All I can do is try.

As a reward for making it this far, and the celebrate the return of my blog, here are some super cute pictures of my kids, because Why Not?