What I'm learning in school these days

The school year has gone better for me since Christmas break, at least for the most part. Yes, at least one day has started with a sobbing child and more than one day has ended with small children running in circles and screaming while I asked/begged/pleaded/threatened for them to stop (without effect, I might add). But overall, I haven't completely lost my patience, and that was my main goal. I'm getting better at handling the "problem" children and I have even been able to laugh at their silly antics once or twice.

I've been thinking a lot in the last week about what I'm learning from this experience, and while I still feel like I'm primarily learning to have patience and love small children, I'm started to learn something else too.

I have several good friends who are having babies in the next few months (all due in March, strangely enough) and I'm watching the babies that were born last year grow up. My best friend Natalie's daughter just celebrated her 2nd birthday and my nieces will be eight months old and six months old in February. I'm surrounded by babies and toddlers, but only in the last week has it dawned on me that one day, my own babies and toddlers will become children. And I will have no control over them.

I used to think it was a parent's responsibility to keep his or her child in line, especially in public places, or to deal with the behavioral problems that crop up at school. But I'm realizing that even the best parents who do everything right still have crazy, out-of-control kids: boys who just can't sit still, girls who just can't stop talking, children who for whatever reason, won't listen or follow directions. And when I'm a parent, there's not a whole lot I can do if slash when I have those kids.

Maybe being a teacher has overemphasized the helplessness of adults against children in my mind, but to some extent it's true. When they are as young as two years old, kids assert their own opinions, and as a parent, it will be my job to try to help them choose the right things without becoming the enemy. What if I am? What do I do then? I have no idea, and frankly, the prospect of having to parent a child who won't listen is terrifying. I have a feeling I won't be quite so pessimistic next week, but I am glad that the shock of realizing that babies grow up hit me now and not when my own babies are running in circles and telling me no.